Why Wolfenstein New Order Missed its Mark

God, please why? Why did they fuck up on such a franchise?

Now I was one of those who played Castle Wolfenstein on the Apple II, and yes, I am that old. That was the first game to have a sampled voice over and we learn to dish out German phrases after spending hours on it. We kicked Nazi ass even before all of those fuckers who reviewed this game were even born. Fast forward to the new era.

For me, I had a pretty good time playing with Wolfenstein PS3 back in 2009. This was an FPS, with the Thule Society and all those badass occult stuff Hitler was famous for thrown in. Now it was a commendable shooter. Nothing great but playable. It had a poor frame rate, gave me a headache each time I played it but still, I didn't say anything bad about it.

As time went on, you got to the point where you start wondering if someone can up the ante, give it a polish and release a new version of the game. So here's what came out of this long wait.

Wolfenstein New Order is a completely new take on the franchise and was one of the most eagerly awaited. Sadly, it just didn't rock my world. First, the story telling was poor. It introduced us to a steam punk type Nazi machinery that was winning the war before moving us ahead to the 60s. The story was all over the place, one moment we are stealing Choppers, next we go to the moon. That holy sort of shit is what made COD franchise stank. The weapons are nothing to shout about, there are some nice touches, like being able to cut through metal and wires but that doesn't happen often or is that obvious unless the game play requires you to do so.

Then we have the sex scenes, well done. So are we suppose to jerk off after mowing down some Nazis? I hope such morbid behaviour will never be adopted in gaming as it is offensive to Nazis and Jewish community at large.

Gamplay

I must say that the melee option was to me, one of the worst in the game. First, all you enemies seem to like turning their back to you. There is no challenge in taking them on as you can suit up with armour to protect yourself. The most creative way to kill Nazis is really to throw them a live grenade. Shooting them is probably part of the fun but with less that enough ammo it doesn't seem all that fun.

The A.I enemies are a little more intelligent that the one found in COD, which often runs in a loop. Here you find the Germans ducking and hiding, without sticking out their body parts for you to shoot at. But there is no challenge after that. The option to carry ammo plays heavily in your game as you don't have much at your disposal.

This is an FPS that is basically a rehash or every other FPS made so far. So don't think for one moment that they have any originality. Then you have the ever boring side missions, like go get a jack hammer or a tool to do something and they send you on a wild goose chase.

The problem with this game is more of the same. There is no cohesive storyline. It gets so boring to the point that you dread playing it after a couple of hours. There is simply no challenge in doing the level as everything is sandboxed so tightly. I even went on to play the 16-bit easter egg version of Wolfenstein twice in the dream sequence!

Now that is pretty sad. The game is huge, but it just lacks the finesse. The gaming stank, the missions were a let down and to make matters worst, the story was assembled by a team of half baked Hollywood wannabes who have no idea what a playable game is all about. To think that this would be a worthy follow up to a grand franchise is totally lost to me. Those critic reviews who loved the game, well I have one word for you....'payola'!

Repeat Play Conclusion

I like weapons, and as an FPS, the whole idea is to have weapons you love using. I hated the weapons choices in this game and yes, that makes this game a real bummer.

The story line is linear, takes you to space and back too. WTF is that all about. Well it might think it was a COD rip off with some sci-fi futuristic stuff thrown in.

As a mindless shooter, it might have some entertainment value for those who are at best...for those suffering from inbred autism. Beyond that, I can't bring up any note worthy points to commend the game past the loading screen.

The deal breaker was the hodgepodge of missions sew together with an even worst storyline. That did it for me. Now I have to find some pill to make me forget this offensive game totally and make believe that in the perfect world, it would never have to exist in the minds and imaginations of the sane.

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Categories: fps, new order, shooter, wolfenstien

FC3 Blood Dragon Goes Retro

Far Cry 3 Blood Dragon was a DLC game for the Xbox 360 and PS3 but is it any good. To be fair, it's not really a full blown game which you may like if you enjoyed FC3. So let me explain.

FC3 Blood Dragon is a weird mix of retro gaming on a current console. Though designed entirely to fit HD TV screens, the first thing you realise is that the cut scenes are all done in 1990s style PS2 sequences. Not a bad thing but the retro story telling is kinda weird. It just doesn't feel right and with that, to hell with the story. I came to conquer and satisfy my blood lust. Should I even care about the furry animals that run amok on the island? Afraid not....

Gameplay

Now here is the problem. The game is tiny by comparison to FC3. The map is small and the challenges are even smaller.  You get to hunt animals and destroy terrorist who hold hostages. The game lets you slaughter cyborgs, which sound like the Cylons you find in the 1980s version of Battlestar Galatica. This is as retro as it gets. But for any blood thirsty FPS connoisseur, it's the gun play that keeps everything in check.

The game lets you shoot, kill and send your enemies to meet their lost kin in a futuristic island where wild animals roam free. It just doesn't play like FC3. The shooting is a hit and miss affair as the guns now fire lasers and energy bolts. Weaponizing is relatively easy as you complete some of the side missions at each garrison to unlock weapon upgrades but it is the ammo that really stops you in the long term. You don't get to carry enough of them. What's more there are so many elements that you find in FC4 which was probably copied from Blood Dragon. One of the most noticeable is the Cyborgs constant attack on those outpost (garrison in Blood Dragon Speak) you have conquered. You have geeknerds on your side, scientist who wear white overalls, but you role isn't to talk tech with them but to fight their battles.

The next thing is something I found very annoying, the landscape is in an awful color. I hated it. It's constantly dark and putrid. The only consolation to come out of it is that you can now see the arrows you fire and know their trajectory. In FC3 and FC4, the coloful landscape makes it difficult for you to judge your arrow trajectory as the arrow sort of disappears from view as it goes into the horizon. The arrows's Blood Dragon come in day-glo colors makes it real easy to judge where your trajectory went wrong and lets you correct your aim by compensation.

Besides, the landscape just don't cut it. Remember the time when you played FC3 and do a double take and say 'Wow' when running up that hill just to admire the landscape. Well, fat chance here. By the way, there are no Telco Towers...well there are Towers but they are not for you to take over to get a larger map. I almost threw up each time I was at a high point of the island. Yes, it's that bad. 

Each outpost is now known as a "Garrison". Each garrison is designed differently, with side entrances but there is always an open entrance which you can drive into. Each drive-thru entrance has a force shield to keep the Blood Dragons out. The layout of the Garrison makes it very easy for you to hide within buildings to ambush your prey compared to FC3 where the open layout means you won't know exactly where they are coming from. The other thing with the garrisons is that they don't call back reinforcements once you are discovered shooting at them from a distance. Instead only 2 Garrisons in the whole game would call for some sort of back up in the form of Choppers. Thus your blood lust can't be rewarded even if you lay waiting for more. It is times like these you wish you had a cigarette to kill the boredom. 

Blood Dragons are Super Boring

Yes. These super predators have poor eyesight so you can sneak around them. They can detect movement so it's never safe around them. However they don't seem to take to Cyborgs in the same way they take to humans. There must be a bug in the game where you notice Cyborgs being ignored by such dragons.

The Blood Dragon is attracted to Cyborg hearts, which you rip out of them as a trophy but not all the time.  You can then use them to lure the Blood Dragon to create havoc on the enemy (which was later adopted in FC4 to lure predators to attack your enemies)

Blood Dragon spit fire. So regardless of where you are, they can get you with their pyro-techniques. Killing a Dragon is a waste of ammo. You can sprint faster than they can run so head for the Fortress if you get chased down.

I found the Blood Dragons a total distraction. When you are out ambushing the Cyborgs, you have to watch your radar to see if one is nearby. They can upset vehicles and and turn an ambush into a huge mess. Then when you kill a Dragon, it turns into mush. There is nothing to harvest, no skin, no flesh...nada.

Weapons are Ho-Hum

Your choices are rather limited for this outing so don't hope on getting the full monty like in FC3. The guns don't fire in a satisfying way. I mean, you know what it is like to have an AK-47. How it fires and how it punches holes into your enemy is what makes you want to use one. The weapons in Blood Dragon doesn't have that sort of feel.

What's more your reloading skills can't be improved. You can't get better at it and there is no skill tree to ante up. No way to sell your loot either, so money can be problem if you use too much ammo taking down a Blood Dragon.

You can virtually take any garrison with just your basic weapons. Shotgun, assault rifle, pistol. The sniper rifle is optional since you can sneak up to them once you are in the garrison. 

These limitations is what sets Blood Dragon apart from FC3 and FC4. The weapons are not fun to use. I found more joy using the bow than any other weapon because iyou can see how your arrows landed on your target. 

Should I Buy This?

If you think you are going to have a repeat of that super awesome gameplay in FC3, well I got news for you, it won't deliver that same excitement.

Blood Dragon uses much of the same code to develop this game but it lacks polish. I can live with the retro graphics, and humour which I found very witty but that alone isn't going to keep you glued to the console.

Blood Dragon should have been released as a mobile game since it was developed as a separate entity. The graphics isn't taxing on a GPU and the game itself is a washed down version of FC3. It is playable nonetheless only if you are looking for a cure for insomnia. 


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Categories: blood dragon, far cry, fps, Ubisoft